Self Care for the Caregiver

STRESS AND HOW TO MANAGE IT

Helping Yourself

When stress does occur, it is important to recognize and deal with it. Here are some suggestions for ways handle stress. As you begin to understand more about how stress affects you as an individual, you will come up with your own ideas of helping to ease the tensions.

Try physical activity. When you are nervous angry, or upset- release the pressure through exercise or physical activity, Running, walking, playing tennis, or working in your garden are just some of the activities you might try. Physical exercise will relieve that “up-tight” feeling, relaxing you, and turn the frowns into smiles. Remember, your body and your mind work together.
Share your stress. It helps to talk to someone about your concerns and worries. Perhaps your HOM team,afriend, family member, teacher, or counselor can help you see your problem in a different light. If you feel your problem is serious, you might seek professional help from a psychologist, psychiatrist, or social worker. Knowing when to ask for help may avoid more serious problems later.
Know your limits. If a problem is beyond your control and cannot be changed at the moment, don’t fight the situation. Learn to accept what is for now until such time when you can change it.
Take care of yourself. You are special. Get enough rest and eat well. If you are irritable and tense from lack of sleep or if you’re not eating correctly, you will have less ability to deal with stressful situations. If stress repeatedly keeps you from sleeping, you should ask your doctor for help.
Make time for fun. Schedule time for both work and recreation. Play can be just as important to your well being as work, you need a break from your daily routine to just relax and have fun.
Be a participant. One way to keep from getting bored, sad, and lonely is to go where it’s all happening. Sitting alone can make you feel frustrated. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, get involved and become a participant. Offer your services in neighborhood or volunteer organizations. Help yourself by helping other people. Get involved in the world and the people around you, and you’ll find they will be attracted to you. You’re on your way to making new friends and enjoying new activities.
Check off your tasks. Trying to take care of everything at once can seem overwhelming, and as a result, you may not accomplish anything. Instead, make a list of what tasks you have to do, then do one at a time checking them off as they’re completed. Give priority to the most important ones and do those first.
Must you always be right? Do other people upset you - particularly when they don’t do things your way? Try cooperation instead of confrontation; it’s better than fighting and always being right. A little give and take on both sides will reduce the strain and make you feel more comfortable.
It’s O.K., to cry. A good cry can be a healthy way to bring relief to your anxiety, and it might even prevent a headache or other physical consequence. Take some deep breaths, they also release tension.
Create a quiet scene. You can’t always run away, but you can “dream the impossible dream.” A quiet country scene painted mentally or on canvas can take you out of the turmoil of a stressful situation. Change the scene by reading a good book or playing beautiful music to create a sense of peace and tranquility.
Avoid self-medication. Although you can use drugs to relieve stress temporarily, drugs do not remove the conditions that caused the stress in the first place. Drugs, in fact may be habit-forming and create more stress than they take away. They should be taken only on the advice of your doctor.

The art of relaxation

The best strategy for avoiding stress is to learn how to relax. Unfortunately, many people try to relax at the same pace that they lead the rest of their lives. For a while, tune out your worries about time, productivity, and “doing right.” You will find satisfaction in just being, without striving. Find activities that give you pleasure and that are good for your mental and physical well-being. Forget about always winning. Focus on relaxation, enjoyment, and health. Be good to yourself.

Ten Ways to Handle Stress

LOOK FOR THE CAUSES. Who or what is at the bottom of the stress? Dealing directly with the person or issue may be the best approach.
EXAMINE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS. What can you do to put more warmth, more communication, and more mutual support into them?
EVALUATE. Not every argument is worth trying to win. Defend values that are important. But learn to ignore lesser issues.
BE POSITIVE. If you fail, don’t concentrate on failure. Deliberately recall past successes. It helps self-esteem.
SEEK ADVICE. Confiding in a friend or in your Hospice of Montgomery nurse can uncoil the tightly wound spring of tension. Seek professional assistance andadvice and input from your hospice team when needed. You’re worth it.
DO SOMETHING FOR OTHERS. Reaching out can occasionally take the focus off self and reduce the stress caused by brooding.
DO ONE THING AT A TIME. The seconds pass in single file. Yet how quickly they become minutes and hours. You’ll get more done with less “hassle” when you concentrate on each job as it comes.
LEARN TO PACE YOURSELF. You can’t operate in high gear all the time. And you can’t just “sit there” all the time, either. Take a break. Go for a walk. Look out the window. Do something else.
EXERCISE. Physical exercise can refresh you after heavy emotional strains. Reading a book can relax you after physical action.
CREATE A QUIET PLACE. Take time to meditate, to pray, if you choose. Recent studies of meditation techniques and yoga show that we can train ourselves to relax.

Source: HIV/AIDS Ministry Careteam Training Manual (1995), Catholic Community Services, Fort Lauderdale, Florida